pleasantly surprised

I heard something once that really stuck with me: that women usually have a pretty good idea about how hot or not hot they are, but they are always a little unsure regarding the whether or not they are considered "cool." I think this is true, for the most part. Most of my girlfriends know their level of hotness, but they really can't tell if they're cool or they come off as dorks. I, on the other hand have the complete opposite problem. I realized a couple of years ago that I rate quite high on the dork scale, and I have become one with this fact. However, I really have no idea my rating on the hotness scale. If it weren't for a select group of guys that completely confuse me and tell me otherwise, I would consider myself in the unhot range. This is such a truth that, for the very brief time that I was surfing match.com, I picked my most unattractive picture, in order to assure that I wasn't giving any sort of false impression of myself. I mean, isn't it always so much nicer when you finally meet someone in person, after only seeing them in photos, and you realize that they are completely unphotogenic and much more attractive in person? The idea of someone thinking to themselves, "oh, she's much cuter in her pictures" makes me squirm. Hence, part of the reason why I refuse to actually go out on a date with someone I've never met. Self esteem issues? Maybe. But they are realistic.
If you haven't been able to tell yet, I am a complete realist when it comes to love. Yeah, the whole Disney thing messes that up every now and then and clouds my judgment when it comes to cute, witty boys, but for the most part I have managed to maintain my realistic, cynical (not because I'm jaded) outlook on love. I mean, it's kind of like the picture thing on match.com. The pleasant surprise of something being better than the image of it you held in your head is priceless. I believe I should create a new philosophy. Screw Wayne Dyer's power of intention! Welcome to the power of things turning out better than the bleak picture you held in your head! I don't really subscribe to this all the time. But when I don't, I'm pleasantly surprised.