online dating boys: pay attention

Ok boys, for those of you who are truly trying to meet girls on match.com, yahoo singles, or one of those other sites that makes you display yourself like you are selling real estate, here are some pointers. Seriously consider these constructive critcism, as K and I spent an entire hour, one day, laughing at some of the match.com guys, and what some of them choose to put on their page. Here are some of the top absolute no nos, if you actually want girls to respond favorably to your page, without breaking into laughter and rolling our eyes:

Numero uno: NO pictures with your shirts off. If you don't understand why, I can't explain it to you. Just believe me.
2) no bow ties or pictures of you from the 80s where you look like you are in the band opening for Cheap Trick.
3)No pictures of your Beamer or other status car, please. It hurts to even look at. Let's have at least some semblance of subtlety.
4)NO sexist joking. Even if it's all in good fun and you say "just kidding" after, you are basically pissing on your $20 a month you spend on that damn dating site.
5)As for the titles you all put on your profile, these are the absolute no nos:
no star trek or battlestar gallactica references;
no "hotswede" or "hot 'insert ancenstry here'" titles;
No "teachytom" or puny professionaly references;
No "Mr. Serious" or "Mr. silly adjective titles;
No "fritoboy" or "sportslover";
No "lonely369" or anything with "lonely" or anything that screams "desperate"; No "just4fun" or "sixpackpony" or other porn site names;
and no "crumbledvelvet" or other titles that make us think you are totally bazaar and stuck in the 80s.
Please, boys, if anything else, stop doing this so we don't have to feel sorry for your ass and cringe.